3/27

Admitting to past mistakes is never easy ... or that's what the people who aren't always right keep telling you.

3/24

The stars would love nothing more than to reveal your future this week, but unfortunately, they're just large luminous balls of plasma held together by gravity in space
- the onion

3/22

"Avoiding showering is not an acceptable form of contraceptive" Thanks 7th grade sex ed.

3/21

Business is dead. Given you quit the coffin factory years ago, this is not a good thing.

3/19

Visualize it and it will come true. Yes, this is a plug for Lasik. Lenscrafters is so 1980s.

3/17

There truly is more than one way to skin a cat, but the limited market for cat skins makes learning more than three methods impractical.
- the onion

3/16

A wise man old said, "If it were easy everyone would do it." Now wipe your tears and go practice for that chubby bunny contest.